Be with the one that makes you happy,
The one that makes you smile,
The one that makes you laugh.
And each day worth while,
Live life for the moment,
Try hard to make it last,
Because life is so fast,
So when you find love,
Don’t let it slip away,
Hold it forever,
And cherish it each day,
As long as you are happy,
That is what you should do,
Love that someone and let them know before your life is through.
Ladies and Gentlemen of the World Wide Web…
Today something hit me like an epiphany – I’m not the woman I thought I was.
I know that sounds a little… odd, but hear me out.
The weekend quickly became the week and for the first time in a long time I got all my Monday tasks at work done in a flash! Literally. I had no hanging assignments -nothing was left undone when I walked out of the office at 5.
Nothing, and I mean absolutely NOTHING, could prepare me for the evening I was about to have. It was an evening from hell, best put. Or an evening from a scene in Waiting To Exhale, or some other drama-filled African American film or novel!
I always imagined that if I ever found myself in the situation I did that there would be tears, breakables smashing, loud arguments, profane language flying…You get the point right? *giggles*
But there was none of that!
I was upset and hurt, of course! My blood was boiling. My heart was beating at a speed I am still not convinced is healthy (…but I’m still alive so…*shrug*). There was no denying my distress. But I did not get angry, at least not to the point where I felt like I needed to burn everything or to break everything. I did, unfortunately, act without much thought as to what the ripple effects would be, and I think its fair for me to attribute that to the disappointment I felt that evening. But the ripple effects of the event far outweigh that of the hastiness of my actions – that’s the worst part.
Instead I, effortlessly and semi-unintentionally, was open to conversation (one overflowing with attitude, a multitude of questions with a side of awkward silence). That didn’t happen until after I threw a mini-fit of course (I wouldn’t be Zindzi w/o the minor drama – right?).
I surprised myself on Monday evening. In fact, I have been surprising me all week. Coming to think of it, this entire year has brought to light a plethora of surprising revelations about myself. Lucky number 22, perhaps?
Bottom line? I am stronger than I like to give myself credit for most days. I am very kind, and understanding, and I have a big heart. Those are some of my strengths, but you wanna know something else? I think they also work against me from time to time.
I know I wallow in my pity sometimes, but in all honesty I am at peace with my choices. I pride myself on my stubbornness. I have no problem hearing your opinion, but 95% of the time I would not take it. And that, ladies and gentlemen of the World Wide Web, is the key to my peace.
Here’s to a maturing mind and a blossoming young woman…*Cheers*
Truth be told, I have always wanted to watch this movie but I have yet to. Fortunately though, in between channel surfing today I happened to catch it playing on HBO. I was mostly milling around the house all day so I really didn’t have a chance to give it my undecided attention but I did manage to take a few wise words away with me and I wanted to share them with you and encourage you to watch the movie or read the book, which ever your preference, whenever time permits. I know I will. And if its any consolation, Julia Roberts gave a stellar performance in this flick! – Check out the quotes below.
If you’re brave enough to leave behind everything familiar and comforting, which can be anything from your house to bitter, old resentments, and set out on a truth-seeking journey, either externally or internally, and if you are truly willing to regard everything that happens to you on that journey as a clue and if you accept everyone you meet along the way as a teacher and if you are prepared, most of all, to face and forgive some very difficult realities about yourself, then the truth will not be withheld from you.
Ruin is a gift. Ruin is the road to transformation.
To lose balance sometimes for love is part of living a balanced life.
Balance is not letting anybody love you less than you love yourself.