I am 21 and have been in relationships but I just can’t seem to find a guy that doesn’t have a girl friend or wants to settle down. Am I wrong for being in a relationship with a guy while he is seeing someone who is away studying and is hardly ever coming back home on holiday? Should I stay away from him as in just be friends? But what if the sex is really good? Am I wrong for that also?
*side eye* Girl, that situation ain’t right. Think of it this way, would you like to be in his girlfriends shoes and have your boyfriend sleeping/seeing/dating with someone else? The truth is if by now he hasn’t left this girlfriend to be with you he never will. I have seen this situation happen to people that I know too many times. It never works out. Either it ends in drama, or it ends out of frustration on your part.
Because there will come a point in time where you will want to be exclusive with him and even if he does agree (and leaves his girlfriend), do you really think that he wouldn’t do to you what he is doing to his girlfriend now? You will never be able to trust him 100%. Yes, the sex may be good, but it ain’t worth it.
Girlie, your goodies shouldn’t be a free ride! Don’t allow him to treat you any less than you should be treated. If he really wanted to wifey you, he would have come correct from the beginning. He would have told his gf what the real deal is, tell her it’s over between them and then spark the flame with you. But has he done that? Noooo. I’m sorry to bring up the old cliché but its rings true, ‘if he cheats with you he will cheat on you’.
I think if you really want the best out of love and life, its best you walk away from that unhealthy relationship now. In the words of Jazmine Sullivan (w/ a touch of Ms.Zindzi’s neck twirlin’ and finger snappin’): ‘You should go and find someone else who could treat you right and give you the world ’cause baby you shine so bright and he will just dim your star’.
Everything takes time, I know it may seem like there’s no one out there, but if you’re in an unhealthy relationship and your vision is blurred by good sex then honey you won’t be able to give any good guy that comes along a chance.
And I know he may have introduced you to his friends, taken you out and all that but Don’t let his games fool you. It doesn’t seem like dude wants to leave his girlfriend to be with you exclusively. Get out and get your life right, the rest will fall in line booboo. And you know what? The sex will be GREAT with someone you love and who loves you back.
Got a question for Ms.Zindzi? Need advice? Email me firstname.lastname@example.org
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