Day: Friday, November 9th, 2007

Gratatouille

Lol…Trust my sense of humour to have thought of a title like that! :-D

Down to the heart of the matter, It seems that all I could think of this week is being thankful, grateful, and gratitude. I’m naturally thankful but this week, my every thought just zoomed in on that specific topic. But I am not worried, I know that it’s just the Big Man showing me that I have a lot to be thankful for. Blessed people have a hell of a life to live! The temptations and trials are endless, it’s just up to us to stay grounded and pick our fights wisely. This week was much needed, and I think I used it well.

Today I woke up quite early for a change. You’d think that counted for somethign right? NOOOO Because as soon as I was through doing what I had to do I slept for hours on end! WELCOME TO THE GOOD LIIIIIFE! Right!! That won’t continue though because its back to class on Monday and I have some assignments to complete before I head back. I am looking forward to resuming classes though. I guess when you’re home too much you wish to be elsewhere and then when your else where you wanna be home. That’s just the human way. We never sure just what we want, or should I say we are just never are satisfied. But why must we be?! There’s far too much to get from life in far too short a time.

Keep God first, and take no experience for granted…you never know how long they’re gonna last!

Today and ALWAYS, Zindzi!

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We truly changed Me.

One thing I find myself doing a lot in my spare time, is looking back at the pieces I wrote earlier in the year or in the years gone passed. I see growth and maturity in each piece. 99% of the time I go “WOW, is this all me?” and the other 1% of the time I just laugh at the utter idle notes I have typed. Regardless, 100% of the time I feel proud. I often wonder where I’d be today, at this very moment, had I not have adapted this positive lifestyle and thinking. I’m sure I would have been a different Zindzi, not in the bad sense of the word ‘different’. Just in its basic meaning – ‘Different’.

Nothing happens over night, everything that is special and worth-while takes time. My first step towards opening up and changing must have been back in 2001 when I started a Diary. You know that diary that we swore our mothers could never have gotten into yet even when we lost the keys a few times we still managed to pry the “lock” open with a hair pin? LOL, remember those? Good. Back then all I could think to write about was “crushes”, “love-life”, “boys”, “best friend drama”, you know what I mean. Its typical of a 12/13 year old anyway, so I am not concerned. Besides, it was a form of expression just the same and look at me now!

As expected I grew not just physically but mentally too. I read more, listened a lot more and developed keen areas of my intellectual and personal life. I can’t say that I have had many personal struggles. Compared to some, I haven’t had the half! But you know something, losing that special friend who I thought I so loved, being gossiped about, being hated on, laughed at and experiencing every other negative situation I have ever been placed in, helped me with my metamorphosis. Don’t think for a second that I implying that at the very instance those things happened to me I was not upset, or hurt, or that I didn’t cry for a while. I’m just trying to show you that as soon as I got over it, I realised that ‘Hey, look at me now. Look at the Zindzi I am now despite all the past BS!!”

It makes no sense I show gratitude to rotten moments and not be happy that I have lived better times. Three words for you: Family and Friends! I tell yah, had I not have the bestest family in the world and the bestest friends to kick me in the ass when I so needed it and pat me on the back in my glory days, change would not have come in too much of a hurry. Trust that! I have said this before and won’t hesitate to say it again, gratitude is as gratitude does! It makes no sense to do well and not have anyone to say “good going” and this works both ways! If I am being a total ass, I have some friends that won’t even hesitate to point it out to me. I swear that sometimes they get some kicks out of it actually! LOL!

Another thing that I have given up on is excuses. Trust me, after going through the child to young adult stage you’ll realise that excuses just don’t cut it anymore. I believe that there is no excuse for ignorance and laziness! I like to accept no less than the best from ever one around me, even myself and thus making excuses won’t help you. At least, not when it comes to me.

Anyway, when I snap out of Reminiscing mode I think “Hey, look at me now!” I’ve gotten Beauty: The Journey off the ground and I am so proud and happy. I am making my family all proud in the process, nothing better than that to me. I’m still very young, I have a lot more life to live but I have broken from my cocoon and here I am, a beautiful butterfly.

After a bad day or stint of time – I have a good laugh, Thank God, sleep, wake up in the morning, Thank God and do it all again WITH PLEASURE!

Today and ALWAYS, Zindzi!

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